Step 1: "Do you see a connection between your own drinking or using, and the fact that your life has become unmanageable? Look, unmanageable is a five-syllable word for 'out of control.' Can you relate to 'out of control?' Yes? Then proceed.Īs for being powerless, it's the same concept. The old-timer knew to make the language as approachable and solution-oriented as possible, and to make the Steps more actionable, he broke them down something like this: Translating the First Three Steps into Plain English So the old-timer kept it simple and started with the first three Steps. He both needed to talk about his own situation, and less so, to listen to an old man's inside story on all things Twelve Steps. So the old-timer took a few moments to describe how it all comes together: "It works through the combination of two things: the fellowship and the program within the Twelve Steps."īut the old-timer could again sense the young man's needs. He knew that one interaction could spell the difference in this young man's decision to give sobriety a chance or return to alcoholism. The old-timer reflected on the gravity of the situation. Being told to stick around and learn the answer for himself wasn't going to cut it. The old-timer could sense the young man's desperation: he needed to hear more than "It works just fine." It was apparent that, given the opportunity, the young man was ready to bolt for the door. The young man asked the old-timer something along the lines of "How does sobriety work?" There's a good chance he'd sung it himself. The old-timer had heard that song before. He told the old-timer that his girlfriend insisted he try out AA, and he wasn't thrilled about it. The young man confirmed that it was, in fact, his first AA meeting, and that he knew nothing about recovery or the Steps. And for that: I am responsible."īut it's one thing to say it it's another thing to live it. When anyone, anywhere, reaches out for help, I want the hand of AA always to be there. In an increasing number of meetings today, groups recite the AA Responsibility Statement: "I am responsible.
We Are Responsible to Other Alcoholics* Who Wish to Be Sober But then the old-timer remembered the AA Responsibility Statement, so he grabbed a chair beside the young man and struck up a conversation. The old-timer thought one of the younger guys in the group would go over and introduce themselves to the newcomer, find out if it was his first AA meeting and so on. Certainly the young man couldn't relate to an "old guy" like him. The old-timer wanted to catch up with his friends, so part of him thought about ignoring the newcomer. The old-timer got the feeling the young man was either new to recovery or this was his very first meeting. He made his way to join them and catch up, but someone unrecognizable stood out to him in the crowd of familiar faces.Ī young man in his early 20s was sitting by himself looking rather grumpy, and his head was buried in his iPhone.
An old-timer walked into a Twelve Step meeting and was greeted from across the room by a bunch of his friends.
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